Here’s to 2016!

2016. Oh, all the shitty things I could say about you. I won’t, because thousands have already echoed my thoughts, but I could. Instead, I’ll recap the happy things in my life and ditch my usual snark. You’re welcome.

EASY by Jordan S Gray : COVER REVEAL + EXTENDED EXCERPT

COVER REVEAL AND EXCERPT INSIDE. EASY It’s been an entire month since Shayler Thompson has orgasmed from something not made out of silicone. If her sour mood is any indication, she needs to get laid like yesterday. So when she walks up to a sexy nerd at the bar and propositions him, it seems like a great idea. Until he rejects her and calls her easy. Still reeling from his hurtful words, Shayler is surprised to find that the nerd, David, is a Teacher Assistant for the one college class she’s totally embarrassing herself in. When he offers to help her study, she accepts, thinking that maybe she’ll get laid after all. But David isn’t into casual sex, and Shayler refuses any sort of commitment. With enough chemistry to light his dumb Prius on fire, she’s sure one of them will eventually give in… She just really hopes it won’t be her. Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/33238850-easy

Reader First, Writer Second

Hi, my name is Jordan Stephanie Gray, and I love writing. I would do it on a train, I would do it on a plane. I would do it in the house, but probably not near a mouse. Of course, it depends… is the mouse cute? Now, all this is to say that almost nothing makes me happier than when I snuggle into bed, turn on my ‘emo kid from the 2000s’ playlist, and get to work. The one thing that trumps this, however, is reading.

Why Princes Aren’t Everything

Romance novels are a lot like fairytales. They center around a heroine, usually stuck in a dreary situation, as she meets her hero, allowing her situation to become a lot less sucky. Of course, in fairytales there are dragons, birds that either clean or attack evil step-mothers, too tight corsets (though this probably applies to romance as well), and magic. In romance, the closest we come to a knight on a white horse is a bearded dude named Rodd Stone who pulls up on a Harley he built himself. In a fairytale, the most important part of the story is the end, which usually revolves around some sort of True Love’s Kiss. A romance is, well, basically the same, except True Love’s Kiss can sometimes be replaced by True Love’s Mutual Orgasm.

Balls Smell like Salty Rubber and Other Truths You Won’t Find in a Romance Novel

The number one critique for romances I see when I check out Goodreads is “it was so unrealistic.” And usually when I see this statement, I want to break out a bowing down gif (but I can’t because I’m technologically incapable most of the time). However, there are certain times when I scoff, flick my hair behind my shoulder, and roll my eyes like I’m getting in a fight with Heidi Montag on The Hills (throwback, anyone?)......